damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Last final this afternoon - Cognition and Language, which was actually kind of nice, because I'm doing pretty well in that class.

It's weird to be essentially done, even if it doesn't really count for almost two more weeks. I can't say that I really loved college, although I can think of ways in which it was probably really good for me - although I do think that the vast majority of any improvement I've made as a person since freshman year was ... mostly because of fandom, not school. I cried like a hungry, angry baby when I picked up my cap and gown for high school graduation, and not in the good way - in the way where I was pretty much wrecked over everything I was leaving behind. But now? ... Not so much. I mean, I feel sort of nostalgically fond of this place, and I bet I always will. But that's not really the same thing. :P

And I guess this isn't a bad time to round up some WinCon unfunny posts for myself. Given the topic of discussion, there is potentially triggery stuff on the other ends of ... probably most of these links: Unfunnybusiness post; seperis; seperis follow-up; musesfool; tzikeh; sparky77; seperis a third time; mistresscurvy; tabaqui. I don't think that's everything I've read about it, but I got to everything I've read about it through some combination of these posts, so. I'm severely not on board with victim-blaming, but everything I could say about that has been said, and, once again, far more articulately. So all I've got left is to say that I really, really wish people would remember more often to throttle their first defensive reaction to any accusation of wrongdoing, and stop to take a careful look at the actions that led to the accusation, instead.

... Now that I've said that, of course, I'm guaranteed to forget it myself at some future date and end up looking like a complete ass, but. There it is.

Anyway, now that I can cross exams and my own personal linkspam off my list, back to the important stuff: my [community profile] ladiesbigbang fic.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
That Diana Gabaldon thing that's exploded all over the place (and made F_W, of course) distracted me like whoa from studying for my Bio final this morning. Fortunately, everything I felt like saying when I first read the OP has already been said, and probably far more articulately than I would have said it.

Somewhat amusingly, I ended up in a half-fight half-discussion with M about the relative merits of original fiction vs. fanfic yesterday, too - probably not the best day for it, considering that I started out already jacked up and full of fandom pride. (For the record, I think of them as pretty much even; each one can do things the other one can't, and they are valuable in equal measure precisely because of those differences. Talking about fanfic as a stepping stone to original fic won't drive me into a frothing rage, but I don't much care for it.) I guess I shouldn't be surprised, though; M doesn't really engage with fandom on a meta level, she's still in a dragons-and-self-inserts kind of place. Which is fine, obviously, but it also makes it kind of hard for me to really have heavy discussions with her about the worth of fanfic. :P It doesn't help that her grasp of feminism is kind of shaky, that she never caught any of Racefail, and that she's not a terribly sex-positive kind of person. Sometimes I have trouble remembering that my IRL friends have not necessarily ever thought about those things.

Fortunately, the Bio final was somewhat less than taxing - it took me about twenty-five minutes to answer forty multiple choice questions and write a short answer about the immune system. And now I'm freeeeeeee. \o/ And will almost undoubtedly spend the rest of the day writing [community profile] ladiesbigbang fic in my notebook.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Finals feel like they are iiiiiiiiinching closer, as slowly as possible. :P I'm going to be so fried by the time they actually get here, just from the stress of anticipation.

Also, half as a reminder to myself: I'm going to try to remember not to crosspost to LJ, as a kind of symbolic gesture towards the [community profile] three_weeks_for_dw event - this is not going to be three weeks of riveting! creative! content, or even three weeks of lame banal content that anyone is going to care about. But DW is my primary home, I crosspost from it to LJ instead of the other way around, and ... idk, even a little bit counts?

It snowed like mad today - today, in late April, which even in Vermont is not a common thing to have to say, though I don't think it's the absolute summeriest snow I've ever seen. Oh, weather.

Also today: the final CCC exam. And man, is it a relief to have that over with - not because I was stressing about the exam itself so much as because the CCC exams have a take-home pre-exam essay portion that is absolutely awful. Not challenging; relentlessly tedious. It was relentlessly tedious to write it for the midterm, and it was relentlessly tedious this time, too. :P Seriously, it was like pulling teeth, except even pulling teeth has some interesting, if sharply painful, moments. I know I should be grateful that it was take-home, and that it was easy and tedious, not difficult and tedious, but yikes.

After that, though, it was all smooth sailing and my progressively-less-tentative [community profile] ladiesbigbang story, which is seriously filling up my fic notebook. I ... might actually sign up. D: I'm frightened of doing that because it means a visible contract to actually put my writing where other people besides my sister can read it, which is deeply terrifying to me; but I'm already only a thousand words away from the minimum, so it's not like I have to worry about having nothing by the deadline, even if what I have is 15k of crap. **hands** idk, I still have, like, two days to think about it.

Oh - and I also broke my record for consecutive hours of consciousness. \o? B had to print out her thesis: three copies, one for each of her defense committee members, and the whole thing with cover and bibliography and all was close to eighty pages. A lot, but not bad, except that she doesn't have a printer. So we used mine, which is a creaky old all-in-one ink printer - I am very fond of it, but it's not going to be setting speed records any time soon. Plus, I had to edit B's thesis before she could print it. I mean, because she asked me to, but secretly, I was just dying to - I've edited B's papers before, and she is just WRETCHED at sentence structure. Like, really abysmal. So that took a while, and then printing out about two hundred and forty pages with my printer was at least a couple hours more. So, in the end, we were up until about 4:00 AM printing.

4:00 AM being past the point where my brain says, "Fuck it," and stops asking me to go to sleep, even getting into bed and lying down and closing my eyes wasn't enough to knock me out. I wobbled and giggled my way through class the next day - apparently sleep deprivation makes me happy - and went to bed early, for a grand total of about thirty-eight hours awake. Good times.

I've also been amusing myself by going back through the [journalfen.net profile] the_hms_stfu archives and enjoying the lolariousness - not that I don't love the stuff that's posted in the comm now, but it's fun to go back to the old days sometimes. Plus, I happened upon a Ron!hate essay that I have been greatly enjoying tearing apart in spare moments.

And now, back to the fic. To sign up, or not to sign up ...
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
I just woke up from a very interesting dream, of which I actually remember some contiguous parts. ) It was kind of cool in a creepy way - it would have bugged me more if all this had not happened with me under the distinct impression that, should the dream continue, I would be fixing this situation. Also, for at least part of it, dream!me was a dude, which has actually happened several times.

I had a little trouble going to sleep last night because of an extremely long bout of asymmetrical tinnitus. It's the first time that I can remember my ears ever ringing for that long, and I'll admit it makes me a little nervous, after all that stuff in Intro Audiology about how asymmetry usually means a referral, because it could be a sign of something wrong neurologically. However, it's only happened the once, so. If it starts happening on a regular basis, then I might see about getting it checked out.

Which reminds me: yes, Hearing Rehab is still on notice. Hard. I actually wrote "fuck you" in my notebook two or three times while taking notes, because it was seriously driving me out of my tree. ) If I expect anyone in the world to remember to make that distinction clear and obvious, it's somebody in CMSI who ought to know this shit. And she just ... never did; not once, through the whole class. >.<

Anyway. I also wrote over a thousand more words of maybe![community profile] ladiesbigbang A:TLA fic during class, which I know is awful and wrong and awful and I did it anyway. /o\ I have essentially finished the first chunk, and it is clocking in at over six thousand words. There are supposed to be around twenty such chunks total, which means that if this keeps up, I am staring 120k words of fic in the face. D: And it's not even the first time; I keep cleverly chaining myself to these massive canon-rewrite "what if" AUs, it's like my catnip. The first fic of the HP AU series is nearly 90k words, and those are probably only going to get longer as they go on (this is assuming I ever even make it through them before I die, natch).

why, brain?!? whyyyyyyyy.

Still, I can't complain too much. At least I have a plan, which is a relief; it's not like I'm diving into 120k words not knowing where it's going. That would be scarier.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
I don't know whether I'm imagining these things, or it's getting close enough to the end of the school year that I'm just sick of everything, or what, but watching these cochlear implant videos in Hearing Rehab is starting to seriously make me angry.

Cut for moderate amounts of rage. )

There was also a girl near the front of the room who asked a question about something being different for the deaf/Deaf versus "normal people"; I'm hoping she just wasn't thinking about her wording, but I still wanted to smack her.

Anyway. The biology exam took less than half an hour, and a lot of that was just because I'm not especially quick when I write by hand, so the question at the end that was meant to be answered in a paragraph or two took me a bit. I almost feel guilty, in a weird way; I spent the last however-many classes listening to music and paying not even a tiny bit of attention, and kind of half-assed my way through studying yesterday, and I still left kind of early.

CCC was kind of interesting, just because I always get curious when people start talking about Mean Girls-type relational aggression. That kind of thing has pretty much never happened to me, and either I'm ridiculously oblivious, or there wasn't much of it going around my high school; so it always draws me in a little to hear people talking about it IRL, because the only place I've really seen it is in movies and TV shows.

Mostly, though, the big milestone for today was that - despite my aforementioned slowness at hand-writing things - I somehow got over a thousand words of what may become my [community profile] ladiesbigbang fic down in my notebook. /o\ This would never have happened in high school, man.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Man, today was a long day - not a bad day, just a long one. Rain all day, which, I do not hate rain, but walking all the way down to Dewey Hall in it is not very much fun. And then Cog-Lang was cancelled, which was obviously good, but meant more walking in the rain than I would've had to do if class had been on. Hearing Rehabilitation was pretty soul-killing; I used to be vaguely interested in audiology, once upon a time, but spending this much time on how assistive devices all have microphones, and infrared waves are light but we can't see them, is just. **hands**

However, we did have kind of an interesting class the other week, where by "interesting" I mean it made me kind of uneasy and angry. tl;dr: deafness, Deafness, and cochlear implants. )

And then, of course, this weekend happened; AT's boyfriend, D, was up, so we watched a bunch of movies together, including The Princess and the Frog. Rife with spoilers. ) Overall, though, I liked it reasonably well. It's not a favorite, but I'd watch it again.

And Sunday afternoon, of course, was Palm Sunday. I did not realize this until I actually got to the Catholic Center, and saw the palm leaves on the table in the lobby, waiting to be blessed. It was very interesting - I was totally clueless about the reading of the Passion, I almost had a heart attack when people started passing missals around because I had no idea what they were doing. I have to admit that I cried a little; the concept of crucifixion is so awful that I can make myself cry just by imagining it a little too vividly, and reading it combined with singing the really lovely responsorial psalm, my God, my God, why have you abandoned me - well. I'm a soft touch. Watching the GoF movie makes me cry, too, and I've seen it at least four times.

Fortunately for my dignity, we had a visiting ... uh, official of some kind - he did the blessing of the palms, and the sermon. And - I know this is awful, but there was something a bit unusual about the way he said things, and he had the hat, and all I could think of the whole time he was talking was the Impressive Clergyman from The Princess Bride. /o\ I am so ashamed. (There was also a moment where he presented political correctness as in opposition to the truth, which was frustrating.)

Anyway. Easter next week - with mass in the morning, instead of the evening. Presumably that one will be a little more cheerful. Plus, I finally get to eat the box of Peeps I've been saving since spring break. :D
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
This is going to seem very peculiar and/or suspicious in light of my last post, but I have taken the first steps on the rocky road to dropping my thesis.

Actually, I think writing that post was part of what prompted me to spend yesterday evening, and this morning, taking a long, hard look at where exactly my thesis is, and where it's going; and it didn't look good. I have a lot of work left to do, and not a lot of time to do it. If it were a matter of effort, yeah, I'll admit I would have trouble mustering the energy to really try; but I don't actually even think it's about needing to up my level of effort anymore, it just literally can't be done in the time allotted.

I e-mailed the Dean of the HCol this morning to ask him what would happen if I came to the conclusion that I could not finish my thesis; he didn't really answer that question directly, just told me to come see him. I just finished a long, teary phone call to my mother that helped me sort out a lot of how I'm feeling about it - my mother is awesome, I totally don't deserve her, but don't tell her I said that - and shot off an e-mail to the Dean's assistant to set up an appointment.

... I have to say, I feel awfully relieved. I think I do still want to work through my data, finish coding and put it through Goldvarb and everything, just because I've put too much time and work in to not learn what I went into this to find out; but it'll be a big load off my mind, not trying to force myself to finish the unfinishable. I know this is both nerdy and massively presumptuous, but I feel sort of like I'm Sisyphus, and I just got permission to let go of that stupid rock and stop worrying about it.

Now, to study for that Hearing Rehab exam I have this afternoon. \o?
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
So, I had a thrilling day in Biology on Tuesday, part of which involved a locked door and me taking it upon myself to hold it open for people - and, in my rush to let someone in, slamming my upper thigh into the corner of a chair arm. I now have a similarly thrilling bruise, which, for some unknown reason, has manifested its darkest regions in the shape of a small three-fingered hand. I am not even kidding, it's like I've been groped by a handsy Elfquest elf.

I also had a thrilling day in Biology today, as it happens, although this was thrilling in a better way: I nearly missed the professor's announcement that he was letting class out early because I was listening to music on my not!Pod and planning fic in my notebook. :D

Less randomly, I have suddenly fallen absolutely ass-over-teakettle for Avatar (the cartoon series, not the movie - not either of the movies, for that matter, although technically the word "Avatar" isn't in the title of the more pertinent one). It's one of those things that makes me curse the Animation Age Ghetto (warning: TVTropes link), because the world is captivating, and the animation is often really gorgeous, and the writing ... sometimes hurts me inside. Like, I used to think L&O and SVU got pretty anviltastic, but Avatar ... yikes. The general impression I have is that most of the eps would benefit from being an hour long. ) But I can't seem to stop myself from going back and watching more. Oh, and: I LOVE TOPH. TOPH BEI FONG IS MY FAVORITE EVERYTHING. ♥♥♥♥♥

Given that my first introduction to the existence of Avatar was F_W, and the massive wankpocalypse that struck the hardcore Harmonian Zutara shippers after the finale, I ... kind of can't believe that I've started an Avatar section in my Cliché Bingo prompt list document. /o\ Curse me for being so easily hooked.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Two exams in the last week; neither of them were all that taxing, but I was pretty sure they wouldn't be. Not that I didn't study for them anyway, of course, even if it was kind of tedious. Especially the stuff for Bio, my god. :P I learned about ionic and covalent bonds in, like, middle school.

The past two classes of Cross-Cultural Communication, we've been watching Where the Spirit Lives, which was very satisfying in some ways and a little disappointing in others. (Today's title lyric comes from the end credits song, I'm Going Home, by the lovely Buffy Sainte-Marie.) Initially, I thought the movie was going to be entirely from the point of view of Ashtohkomi. I was half right. ) Anyway. It was good, and Michelle St. John was brilliant, and I'm glad I watched it; but I think there were some ways that it could have been better.

B is, as always, annoying me. No new complaints; just the sex-positivity thing again. ) So that was a fun talk.

At least The Daily Show's been good lately. That Moment of Zen with the lady talking about sex ed, and sounding so aghast about the idea of people explaining to kids that masturbation feels good? ... I lol'd.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
I am tired of being terrible at titling my posts, and so have decided to go the pretentious route: moderately appropriate song lyrics with no capital letters. \o/ I see no way in which this can fail me.

The reason this line applies is because on Friday, I had my first meeting of Music in Live Performance, a one-credit class I'm taking because AT asked me to and I am a doormat. :D It's not really much of a class: we go to the space where one of the five concerts we'll be attending is being held, and talk to the performer(s) for half an hour, and then stay for the concert. And at the end, we have to turn in some kind of journal thing, so that they can actually have something to grade.

Anyway, Friday's concert was performed by this man, who is pretty fabulous. The people in the course came early, and we ended up climbing up onto the stage and singing a piece of shape-note music with him, which was lovely. I cannot read music, but fortunately we went through it a few times, and that's generally all I need to be able to sing something reasonably well. (If we operationalize "well" as a measure of right notes hit, not quality of voice, that is.) He tended to favor a style of music that I rather like, although my favorites were the more up-tempo ones.

The reasoning behind the title is that one of the songs he sang during the concert was a version of the same story that is told in the song "The Cruel Sister", of which the title is the first line. His version was a bit abbreviated, in addition to differing in the details: the minstrel made a fiddle out of the dead sister's bones and hair, not a harp, and when he played it, it would only make the sound of wind and rain; the song ended without the minstrel going back to the family's house and playing the instrument at the cruel sister's wedding, and so the crime was never revealed. He also sang a version of another song that I know best because the Old Blind Dogs sang it, this one being "Edward", except in this one, the brother was killed, not the father, and, again, it ended early - the narrator settled for exiling himself, and didn't go into how he was going to let his castle fall into disrepair, leave his family to beg for a living, and curse his mother to Hell.

... Oh, traditional music. How so bloodthirsty?

I also got reintroduced to my own subconscious Eurocentrism; I experienced a brief and damning moment of surprise when AT revealed that she was not acquainted with Ichabod Crane or the Legend of Sleepy Hollow, despite being well aware that AT's cultural background is Viet, and she would have no reason to know either. Which reminds me of yet another time B has nearly made me blow my stack. ) Argh.

Still, it was not nearly as bad as the flag conversation. )

... it's only until May, it's only until May, it's only until May ...

In less infuriating news, I had two Harry Potter dreams that I only vaguely remember, and a third about spiders that was truly awful (one of them was huge and black and shiny and under my bed, and the other was smaller and kind of like a daddy longlegs but then it grew and grew and its body was all fat and squishy when I kicked it out the door except then I was trapped inside with the big black one-), all on the same night. I must have been sleeping pretty badly, to wake up three times, but fortunately I could nap the day after.

Also, despite having to study for a Hearing exam that was moved up, and slogging dutifully away through my thesis, I've still managed to get to the fourth chapter of the second book of the HP AU. Which may be due to the fact that I spent all of my classes on Tuesday writing in my fic notebook, and managed to get down a very pleasing ~2,000 words. I am such a terrible student. /o\ I also watched the first Narnia movie today, because it came through my Netflix, and, man, if you're looking for it at all, the Peter/Edmund just leaps off the screen and slaps you in the face. (Then again, I may be biased; most of what I remember about the second one consists of Peter and Caspian smoldering at each other and Susan's battle eyeliner.)

That was ... maybe a smaller wall o' text than usual? I'm trying to cut down a little. :D


Jan. 24th, 2010 12:48 pm
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Whew. It's been a while; I've been busy and lazy by turns, and occasionally lazy in order to put off impending busy times. :P

I'm actually pretty pleased with my selection of classes for this semester. ) It's a pretty good bunch to be taking the semester I'm going to be working on my thesis, I think; I should have a lot of free time to work, which is a big relief.

B, I am less pleased with, but I was kind of expecting that. :D I can't wait to get through the acclimatization week and back to the point where most of what she does doesn't bother me, but, man, it always seems to take forever. For somebody who's done so many papers on prostitution, and is always insisting that sex is what makes the world go 'round, she's not very sex-positive; she uses insults like "slut" and "whore" a lot, and it gets on my nerves with a vengeance. And she's just plain terrible at sympathizing with or understanding any perspective other than her own, which is part of a bigger problem she seems to have with understanding that generalizations mean pretty much squat as far as individual people are concerned.

But I can't let it annoy me; I just have to keep trying to change her mind in small increments, and not get angry.

... sigh.

Fortunately, I have other things to occupy me, like the transcription I really ought to be doing right now, and some short papers for various classes that I want to try to get done so that I can focus on my thesis later. So.

... it's only until May, it's only until May, it's only until May ...
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
So, I watched the newest (at least, I think it was the newest) ep of The Closer last night.

I had really mixed feelings at the outset, but I think overall more things ended up being right than wrong - I'm not sure, though, it still hasn't totally settled yet. My tentative perspective. Spoilery, natch. ) I was especially leery because of the whole VB-returns thing on F_W, and the attendant pronoun fail that is thankfully mostly over now; but I think the ending at least partially made up for the obnoxious parts of the beginning. I don't know, I'll have to let it percolate a little more.

In academic news, the World Lit final on Thursday went by without much of a hitch. I'm terrible at writing essays by hand, I get so tense I have to shake my hand out every few words or else I can barely write, but I think I managed okay. Then there was nothing until yesterday afternoon, which was the Cog-Neuro exam. I ... probably should have studied for that a little bit more than I did, but I think it turned out all right. This afternoon is Audiology, for which I plan to "study" by making myself a paper diagram of an audiometer and practicing in my room. Fortunately, I can do that without feeling like an idiot, because B finished her last exam and left for home yesterday afternoon. (I know this makes me a horrible person, but: \o/!)

So. Paper audiometer. Right.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Yesterday was quite a day. I left in the morning for Audiology, having lingered just long enough to watch B wake up and discover that it was snowing outside (she loves it when it snows), and when I came back, the door to our room was open and the recycling bin was out in the hall. Hmm, says I to myself, this is unusual, and so I was in some sense braced for it when I came level with our doorway and discovered that the floor was covered in water, and B was hoping desperately that I was the clean-up crew.

The Saga of the Drains, complete with happy ending! )

Today has been much less interesting so far. Turned in my film journal and took the final quiz in Human Cultures, which means that class is officially over as far as I'm concerned, since there's no final exam. The World Lit final is tomorrow at 11:30, and then I don't have another exam until Cog-Neuro on Monday afternoon. w00t.

I have to admit, I kind of like exam week. Yes, there's studying, but if you pace it right, you end up with so much free time. And it doesn't hurt that my mom sent me a package full of candy to help me through - also doesn't hurt that B is leaving sometime next Tuesday, while I am not leaving until next Friday. ^^

Which reminds me. Yet more things B has done lately that annoy me. ) She put her scarf on again this morning, and asked me whether she looked more Soviet or more Muslim; I told her that all she looked like to me was a person with a scarf over their hair, just like anybody else would if they had a scarf over their hair, but I don't think she got the point. If only I were more articulate.

Anyway, I should stop griping and start studying for World Lit. \o/
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
First, a meme! From various places, I forget whose journal I saw it on first.

1. Write down the names of 10 characters.

2. Write a fic of fifteen words or fewer for every prompt, using the characters determined by the numbers. Do NOT read the prompts before you do step 1.

1. Harry Dresden (Dresden Files)
2. Morgana (Merlin)
3. Gwen (Merlin)
4. Karrin Murphy (Dresden Files)
5. Hellboy (Hellboy [movie])
6. Arthur (Merlin)
7. Susan Rodriguez (Dresden Files)
8. Merlin (Merlin)
9. Liz Sherman (Hellboy [movie])
10. John Myers (Hellboy [movie])

I ... failed utterly at sticking to the letter of this meme; apparently I'm almost incapable of expressing myself in exactly/under fifteen words. But I kept them all to under twenty-five words, at least. >.> <.< That totally counts. Also, the lack of variety in fandoms is a little pathetic. /o\ I am so bad at branching out.

Eleven indubitably lame ficlets! )

Kind of figures my first genuine postage of fic would be a bunch of teeny chunks that'll never go anywhere. Although I am actually almost tempted to keep going with a couple of those - never mind the eighty billion things I ought to finish first. Curse you, finals week. I shake my fist in your general direction.

In the unfunny business end of things, I almost cried in Human Cultures today, out of sheer frustration-by-proxy. We finished up the second half of the final part of A Kalahari Family, the documentary by John Marshall, and jesus. Every single time there was a clip of yet another white "expert" talking about how the !Kung were so ~close to nature~, I wanted to punch somebody in the face, because it was so transparently an excuse to keep on failing to actually do anything helpful - like, say, get supplies to fix the pumps needed to keep the !Kung farms running. (Which, I might add, were only broken in the first place by elephants, who, according to Marshall, are not native to the area; they were brought in to give tourists something ~African~ to goggle at.) It was disgusting.

I will say it made me really glad I decided to start using Kiva: I'm not completely useless! Mostly useless, sure, but not completely! \o/

My to-do list at the moment mostly consists of my Human Cultures film journal, which is due next Wednesday, and starting to study for both the last Human Cultures quiz (also Wednesday) and my World Lit final (Thursday, aka the first day of final exams). No matter how many semesters I do this, I'm always so blindsided by finals. The end of the semester seemed so far away before Thanksgiving!
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Looks like it's storydump time once again; my classes have picked up ever so slightly, possibly because the professors can all sense Thanksgiving inching closer, and combined with all the proofing of other people's papers I've somehow ended up doing (AT asks me to check over her Spanish papers! I don't even know Spanish!), some of my copious free time has started slipping out of my grasp.

Which is ironic, considering that I was bored in September, and now NaNo is coming up. Oh, life.

Anyway. In the category of Offensive Things B Has Said/Done, there are a couple new gems, including rape is funny! This movie might have a rape scene in it, but it's a comedy! ) Needless to say, I was not at all amused.

B laughed.

As has recently become my SOP, I let her know what I thought, although not with the kind of language or at the kind of volume I might have liked. Br came down very firmly on my side later, which was a relief, but B still insists the movie was funny, which kind of makes me want to cry.

The other one was the somewhat less distressing he sounds gay! ) I did not know it was possible to be "too PC" for Vermont, of all states.

The interesting thing is that I wasn't being PC. Perhaps this is just me, but that term tends to connote more calculation than anything else, when I hear it - you are being PC if you are careful or are telling other people to be careful what you/they say because you are worried that a member of some kind of minority will one day overhear and be offended by it. And I'm pretty sure that used to be what I was doing, at least in some cases. But somewhere in the last few years, I've managed to grow a brain, and now it's more about stopping things because they are actively offending me, not because they have the potential to offend somebody else. I mean, I still want to make sure that I speak up when I see something that might bother somebody who isn't me, because it's better than nothing even if it speaks to an enormous lack of empathy on my part, but most of the time, now, I am offended. That attitude toward rape bothers me immensely; and, yes, partly it bothers me kind of on behalf of anyone who has ever been sexually assaulted, but mostly it just bothers me, even though I am not a member of that group (... yet, I suppose I should say, considering the odds). That attitude toward gay men, likewise, bothers me, even though the odds are very long that I will ever be a gay man, and I am terribly lacking in gay male friends.

... And now I need to stop talking about this, because I'm getting progressively less able to communicate my point, and also if I don't stop I am going to be hugely grouchy and sharp with B when she comes back.

On the more amusing end of the spectrum of stupid I've encountered recently, there was a boy in my World Literature class who ended up taking control of the class discussion, and moved it kind of abruptly away from the Aeneid and toward the value of war. ... In a sense where he said, "I'm okay with America becoming a violent empire that takes over the world if it means I'm going to be wealthy and happy," almost verbatim. He quoted Sean Hannity on the matter of America being the greatest nation God ever put on the earth, unironically. He actually told the class that it was a good thing the French, the English, and the Germans had been such good "warriors" (yes, that is the word he used), because otherwise America wouldn't be here - they wouldn't have been able to clear out all those Amerindians who were in their way, after all.

It pretty much went like this:

CRAZY BOY: **talks a boatload of ridiculousness**
REST OF THE CLASS: ... there is not enough D: in the WORLD.
ONE AWESOME KID IN THE CORNER WHOM I NOW ♥: Well, he did quote Sean Hannity. I mean, what were we expecting, after that?

Basically, the AKitC (Awesome Kid in the Corner) saved the whole incident from being something that it would make me sad inside to remember, and turned it into a reasonably amusing anecdote to tell people. ♥, AKitC. ♥.

I'm still going to mass on Sunday afternoons - I really, really enjoy the singing, although I'm still a little nervous that somebody's going to get weird about me being in the choir, and it's interesting to listen to the sermons. Sometimes I almost feel like the sermon ruins the day's reading, because the passages from the Bible are so eloquent they pretty much speak for themselves. And there is always the occasional awkward moment - last Sunday, for example, the reading was from the end of Mark 10, the passage about the blind man named Bartimaeus asking to be healed. The ... priest? I am still not sure about my terminology - went a little overboard in imagining the awfulness of being blind; I was with him on it being something of a shame to never see the faces of your parents, but the look of love in somebody's eyes strikes me as kind of take-it-or-leave-it (wouldn't the sound of love in somebody's voice, or the feel of love in somebody's touch, be pretty amazing?), and he totally lost me on the blind missing out on the "fullness of being a human person" [sic]. I was expecting him to go on to something like never seeing the colors of a sunset, not, you know, somehow not being a complete person. o.O

Also, I still have trouble not laughing when the bells ring during the transubstantiation (and why do I know that word and not what the guy who talks is called?); I know this is awful of me, but it seriously does sound like the background sound effect for a moment of truly terrible SFX from an old episode of The Twilight Zone, or something.

The HP AU is ever so slowly inching its way toward completion. I'm trying to get a decent chunk of it done before NaNo starts, but it is dawning on some part of my subconscious that when I finish it - well, when I finish it I'm going to edit it, natch, until it is less awful, but at some point after that, I'm going to ... post it. Probably on the Pit, first, although I'd like to have it here, too, just for the sake of having all my fannishness in one place (with tags!). Other people (besides M and my sister) will be able to see it. /o\ I ... I don't know about this whole "writing" thing.

And, of course, it doesn't help that NaNo is starting to take over my brain. The odds are on a sequel to last year: this time, instead of thwarting the massive evil plot of a clockwork company in AU!Britain, my dwarf airship pirate captain and her trusty crew will most likely be fighting demons in AU!India. And possibly borrowing a goddess's hammer to do a little smashing; we'll see.

Aaaaaaaand now that I'm done with this giant wall of text, I should go get dinner. \o/
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
Hey, look, it's another really long annoying post. \o/

First, two weird/mildly interesting dreams. ) I know I'm probably getting excessive about recording these things, but some of them are really interesting, and I'm hoping I'll get better at remembering them as time goes on.

In Human Cultures last week, we watched a video about the gold rush and consequent white settlement of Papua New Guinea, about which I have a few thinky thoughts. ) Mostly, I ended up wondering what would have happened if the Papua New Guineans had had the chance to control their own natural resources, instead of having them essentially stolen.

I also have new gripes about B to record. For reasons that don't need exploring at this juncture, she came to Chicago on the trail of her father's killers rented both Princess Mononoke and Life Is Beautiful. Life Is Beautiful, she rented without knowing it was a movie about the Holocaust; along the way, there is a point at which it becomes obvious beyond a shadow of a doubt that the main character's family is Jewish. B responded to this revelation with the following utterly boggling statement: "But [the main character] doesn't look Jewish."

Fortunately for my own self-respect, my mouth did not manage to get in the way of my brain this time; I said something rather acidic about how, yes, right, of course, because you could definitely tell whether people were Jewish just by looking at them. Fortunately for our continuing friendly relations, she immediately turned sheepish, and apologized.

(... For the record, B does not spend every second of every day saying offensive things; just the other day, she paid for a complete stranger's lunch because he forgot his student ID card. I have to start noting the times she makes me glad I know her, too, just so that I don't end up with a ton of bitter entries and nothing nice to balance it out. :D)

And, finally, I spent this last weekend at home. We don't get today off, but Friday was our fall recess, and today I only have - well, would have had - one class, so I skipped and spent an extra day at home. The guineas are truly enormous now; they haven't lost all of their baby feathers yet, so if you had to, you could probably tell Clary, DG, and Evey apart, but it's tough. They have also developed the adorable habit of following anyone that comes within a fifteen-foot radius, including people, the dogs, and the car. They don't like to be without the sound of human voices, so we've put a clock-radio out in the barn, and we turn it on for them to listen to.

My sister got my mother a board game - The Settlers of Catan - for her birthday; we played it about four times this weekend, and came up with at least a page of alternate rules. The most significant alteration was probably our set of changes to the Robber. ) Probably worrying about the meta implications of a board game makes us both complete freaks, but. I like the Reaper a lot better than the Robber. I'd worry about having erased the natives of Catan, except I don't think the game's creators intended for anybody to think of the Robber as such, or, indeed, for anybody to worry about whether Catan had a native population in the first place. Which is kind of fail in its own way, I guess.

I am managing to mostly keep up with SPN through reaction posts; I really, really don't want to spend time and energy watching the show until I know how S5 is going to end. Which I know is wimpy, and possibly even kind of wanky/entitled, but I need to be happy, okay. Unless the ending is in the general vicinity of what I want to have happen, I don't want to get myself super invested, because then I will cry like a baby. A hungry, angry baby. And be sad.

The same kind of goes for Merlin, except without the worry - that's just because I don't have access to the show at the moment.

I spent pretty much the entire trip back on the bus making hypothetical mental vids to the songs that came up on my playlist. Peculiarly enough, the fandom that comes most readily to my mind when I hear Stroke 9's Do It Again is due South, solely because of the "you're a freak" part; every time I hear that, there's, like, a ghost "... understood" that follows it in my brain, and I spend the rest of the song picturing RayK and Fraser.

... Someday, I should actually watch that show.

Also, I did not throw up on the bus, or pass out. \o/
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
This is probably going to end up a huge, unwieldy monster of a post, but, again, I have accumulated absolute oodles of things to say.


I went home this past weekend. )

The guineas are enormous - they've got to be at least five or six times as big as they were when they were newly-hatched and fluffed out, and their feathers have come out very fast. Fortunately, their heads haven't changed much, so you can still tell Clary, DG, and Evey apart by looking at the sides of their faces; but I expect that won't last too much longer. Maybe we should write the first letters of their names on their legs with a Sharpie, or something.

While I was at home, I resumed my usual pose of sloth on the couch, which was how I came to end up watching Blade: Trinity. ) And it was very weird to see Ray Kowalski CKR as a bad guy yet again - I don't even know why that weirds me out so much, it's not like I've actually watched due South, and yet a combination of people's icons and Googling have imprinted him on me as RayK. Oh, and John Doe as Dracula was just ... wow. That was very strange. (Not that he didn't do a good job, or anything, but John Doe was so ... well, okay, mild-mannered is the wrong word, considering some of the stuff he did on the show, but.)

When I came back to UVM on Sunday night, B wasn't in the room, so I went upstairs, to visit my suitemates from last year - let's say Br and AT, if I haven't already called them something else. Anyway, they were watching Penelope, which I have already seen once before. ) And, lastly, thank you so very much, every bandom fic that has ever made any mention of the potential resemblance between Gerard Way in drag and Christina Ricci; it was like an optical illusion, my brain kept flipping back and forth between what was actually happening in the movie and "omg if I squint like this I can pretend Gerard Way and James MacAvoy are gazing soulfully at each other!!!1!"

I'd natter some more about my classes, but there's not a lot to say. I am still mildly underwhelmed by Audiology; as always, I love the professor, but she spent at least half an hour explaining something that seemed ... only the slightest bit tricky, if even tricky at all, to me. :P I did finally get my books for World Lit; the Egyptian poetry is just as awesome as I remember, and I want to dust off that one conlang and try translating a few; hopefully, I'll get around to that during all my free time tomorrow. And Cog-Neuro is still simultaneously dizzying and boring, a combination which is not exactly improved by the stultifying heat in that classroom. Blegh.

I did finally manage to force out the seventeenth chapter of the HP AU, which is good, because that was really tripping me up; the beginning of the eighteenth has come much more easily, which hopefully means I won't get quite as stuck on it. And all my free time so far has been incredibly good for my cliché-fic - I now have a bewildering one hundred and eighty-one (181!) snippets, of varying length and equally varying odds of ever being finished, over ... four fandoms (well, four fandoms if you don't count the ones the crossovers cross over with, at least). I am simultaneously impressed and unimpressed with myself.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Cartographer)
Having yesterday off is screwing me up so badly; I kept thinking today was Monday, and then somehow it had switched to today being Wednesday by midmorning.

Still, I managed to keep my brain from making me miss any classes. Audiology was another stunningly dull review, this time about the anatomy of the ear, which I remember pretty clearly from Speech and Hearing - it wasn't the professor's fault it was dull, she was awesome as always. I have to remember to get my HIPAA training done again; no way am I going to find the certification form from last year, so I might as well do it again.

World Lit was the second half of Gilgamesh, and then a bunch of Egyptian love poetry; the poetry was a mix of dirty, funny, and beautiful that really worked for me. Unfortunately, I don't have my book for that class yet - although it should be on its way soon - so I can't repost any for future reference for a while. Sadface! On the plus side, the discussion was mildly interesting, and I had the presence of mind to write down a whole bunch of the cliché bingo prompts I still haven't written snippets for in my notebook, so I got a fair amount of brainstorming done, if not a huge amount of actual writing. \o/

Cog-Neuro wasn't bad in an objective sense, but there's something about the hour-and-fifteen minute classes that gets to me; I usually lose the majority of my powers of concentration at about the hour mark, and spend the last fifteen minutes fidgeting and counting down the seconds under my breath. ... That's probably a habit I should break.

I bought a new ID card. It has become a ritual for me to lose my student ID at least once a year; this year, I started early. Rather than waiting for it to find its way back to me, as it has with kind of bewildering regularity in the past, I decided to go ahead and shell out the $15 for a new one - the magnetic strip on the old one was starting to wear and need more than one swipe to work, so it was probably time. It's very weird, having a new one. I'm not even a tiny bit photogenic ... ) Whatever, I am so overthinking this. It's just an ID card, self! :D

Anyway. We have a coloring book for Cog-Neuro, along with a normal textbook; we had a whole handful of assignments in it, and I spent most of this afternoon on them, after buying myself some colored pencils at the bookstore. It felt weirdly adult, to have a need for something, and go, without asking anybody or telling anybody or anything, to buy it for myself. Which is, again, making a bigger deal than necessary out of something relentlessly ordinary, but that seems to be the order of the day, here.

B is still driving me crazy ... ) But other than that, it's all been much more tolerable.

Aaaaand now it's basically 11:30, and I have Human Cultures at 8:30 tomorrow, so.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
I have so many things to say today!

First, my Tuesday-Thursday classes:

Audiology. )

World Literature. )

And Cognitive Neuroscience. )

The other thing, which could totally make a post all on its own, is my roommate, B, who is driving me crazier than usual. I met her in freshman year; she was the first friend I ever made in college. She was my opposite in almost every way at the time. ) I'll be the first to admit that I don't know nearly enough about these issues, and it feels awkward to post about it with myself cast as some kind of white knight when actually it's just that I'm slightly less uninformed than B, but it's starting to bother me so much that I just can't keep my mouth shut.

But enough srs business; M, J, K, Ka, and Q will be here in a few minutes, since they've driven up to visit, so I should hit post on this monstrosity and then go meet them.
damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
So, Human Cultures this morning was AWESOME. I was expecting it to be at least decent, since I didn't get the professor that my suitemate last year hated, but it was even cooler than I could have hoped.

The professor was awesome; he did tend to ramble a little bit, but he was funny, and he has kind of an interesting outlook on what exactly it means to be an anthropologist. And then he showed us the fantastic and wonderful BabaKiueria, which I daresay I would not have understood nearly as well a year or two ago.

And then I had breakfast, by which I mean I bought an egg-and-cheese breakfast sandwich from Alice's, and came back to the room to finish decorating my desk and unpack a few more things. I also took a really nice nap. :D

Tomorrow should be fun - I'm planning to go to Audiology in the morning even though I'm not actually registered for it so that I can maybe have a chance of squeezing into the class (which is already overfull, if the registration website is to be believed). \o/


damkianna: A cap of the Reverend Mother from the Dune miniseries, with accompanying text: "Space cowgirl." (Default)
'tis not so deep as a well

October 2017



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